Darcy Luoma Coaching and Consulting

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What do you need this summer?

Darcy relaxing by a lake, reading a book, summer self care, titled what do you need this summer

Summer has finally arrived in Wisconsin, and we know it won’t last long. How many times have you said, “Where has the summer gone?” 

While we are all dealing with uncertainty, one thing I know for sure… this summer won’t be typical. Summer camps and sporting events have been cancelled, and vacation plans are postponed. 

But there’s a bigger question than “What are we going to do this summer?” now that all your typical outings are off the table. The more important question right now is: 

“What do I need this summer?” 

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Mask or No Mask: Your Choice About Other People’s Choices

By Jill Mueller

Trips to the grocery store are no longer the leisurely errand that they used to be. Mask? Check. Hand sanitizer? Check. Grocery list that includes every item needed in order of store location? Check. 

And all of that is before even walking through the sliding door!

Personally, I have made the choice to shop exclusively at stores that have arrows on the ground pointing everyone in the same direction and tape marking six feet spaces so you know how far back to stay in line. Love it. These precautions greatly reduce my anxiety when grocery shopping right now.

This past weekend, I was going up and down the aisles wondering if rice would be in stock (it wasn’t) or if SpaghettiOs would be on the shelf again (they were!). Everyone I saw was wearing a face covering, heeding the arrows, and staying somewhat six feet apart.

And then I got to the soup aisle.

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Try Questions as your Answer

One day when my youngest was about eight, she came running down the stairs and exclaimed, “Mom! I just remembered that I forgot to tell you I need gold tights for my dance recital on Saturday!” As you might guess, it was Wednesday night.

Now I admit there was a time when I would have immediately sprung into action mode, put down the book I was reading, and frantically raced around town trying to find gold tights. There would’ve been grumblings about why she waited so long to tell me. Maybe even a frustrated email to the dance teacher questioning why she didn’t let me know about the need for tights instead of relying on my eight-year old to tell me.

However, thankfully, taking a coach approach had become my default by this point. So instead of flying into fix it mode, I glanced up from my book, looked my daughter in the eye and said, “Oh gosh, that sounds like quite a dilemma. What are you going to do?” And then I took a sip of my coffee.

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One Lesson I Learned in Senator Kohl’s Office

When I started working at Senator Kohl’s office, it was my first time managing people. Needless to say I had a lot to learn. We did annual performance evaluations, and most of my team members dreaded them. And I’ll be honest, I didn’t exactly look forward to them either!

I thought an effective way to evaluate their performance was to spend most of the meeting telling them all the ways in which they had (or had not) met expectations and then set their new goals for the coming year. This was my chance to be a great boss and turn them into better employees! I needed to have all the answers.

But then I got certified in coaching, and I started to see the flaws (and there were LOTS of flaws) in my approach. It turned out that my desire to prove myself meant I was overlooking something really important: partnering with the employee and asking their opinion.

I also learned from the Senator himself. He was masterful at holding his employees as the experts and asking lots of questions. 

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